tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-225462722011-08-14T21:59:03.855+07:00crappy insignificant trashtalk of a hopeless student living abroadadyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.comBlogger1571100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-72785377355486211832011-05-14T22:20:00.001+07:002011-05-14T22:20:53.888+07:00

Saya? Kamu bertanya pada saya? Memangnya saya ada? Kamu dapat melihat saya? Walah. Saya kira saya transparan, tembus pandang layaknya masyarakat yang menginginkan transparansi anggaran pemerintahan. Sudahlah, jangan kebanyakan ngelantur, nanti malah dibilang banyak bacot. Saya adalah tiada. Ada namun tiada? Kontradiktif. Memang. Saya adalah kontradiksi itu sendiri. Saya adalah paradoks yang

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-54647536148312852092011-05-09T05:29:00.001+07:002011-05-09T05:29:31.986+07:00

Kubungkus buah pikiranku dalam bahasa yang berbelit-belit sehingga hanya segelintir orang mengerti apa yang kumaksud. Hari ini kumulai dengan segelas kopi susu dan memasak nasi goreng. Tapi bukan untukku. Hari yang gelap ini kumulai dengan menyalakan bara diujung kumpulan tembakau berbalut kertas. Berharap ajal lekas datang menjemput. Impian dan cita-citaku nyaris sirna, tertelan takdir. Jikalau

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-63857715009857482562011-05-09T00:22:00.000+07:002011-05-09T00:22:49.919+07:00

Gelisah ku arungi malam ini. Seperti malam-malam sebelumnya yang kulalui dengan kesendirian sebagai teman. Malam ini cukup istimewa, ketika ku memutuskan untuk meninggalkan yang tercinta. Satu-satunya manusia yang bisa kucurahkan segala isi hati. Ya. Malam ini adalah yang terakhir ketika ku bercerita tentang kisah hidupku di tanah rantau. Mungkin. Tapi bukan berarti muskil. Lelah. Mungkin itu

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-88401266576048556752011-05-08T18:54:00.000+07:002011-05-08T18:54:53.288+07:00

What is the purpose of my creation? Beside wasting my parents' time and money. Saat ini adalah saat dimana wejangan kedua orangtua saya menghantui tiap ekstrak pikiran saya. 'Harus menjadi yang terbaik', itulah wejangan mereka. Sampai saat ini, aku selalu beranggapan bahwa aku adalah salah satu yang terbaik, meskipun bukan yang terbaik. Yang penting adalah tidak menjadi yang terburuk dan

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-16162234021412988002011-05-08T16:49:00.000+07:002011-05-08T16:49:45.247+07:00

Sinar lilin mengikat, mengingatkan akan arti kebebasan Memberi udara dan berlari tanpa beban, menuju mimpi dan cita-cita Idealisme akan kehidupan membelenggu hati Melepas asa, memanggil nelangsa Gelap malam memanggil, mengajak bertualang dalam imaji Sinaran bintang tak nampak tertutup awan yang berlarian tertiup angin malam Mengutuk malam dan kesendirian seolah itu adalah kejahatan Sia-sialah

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-32214023601713861812011-04-30T03:52:00.001+07:002011-04-30T03:52:37.332+07:00

Sendiri di tengah kegelapan malam Tertelan kelamnya sepi Sinaran bintang menyinar Mengganti bulan yang tertutup awan Sensasi ragawi kurasa sendiri Kontemplasi batin kujalani dalam diam Ditemani sinaran alam temaram Hembusan angin bertiup bersahutan Tetes air menetes dalam keheningan Embun pagi merintih perih pada dinginnya Kicauan makhluk bersayap menyambut pagi Sesekali kendaraan

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-85840488525593644942011-04-25T23:56:00.001+07:002011-04-25T23:56:26.391+07:00

sendiri. tersesat. hilang. lenyap. sirna. kembalilah dia dari petualangan panjang tanpa hasil tiada cerita hanya membuang waktu tak bisa diulang dibuang begitu saja seolah rupakan nestapa bagai kenangan tiada arti tak pedulilah dia akan yang telah terbuang dengan sia-sia tentang semua kata yang terucap air mata yang tertetes keringat yang mengalir dan luka yang tertoreh hilanglah akan sukma

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-78901841065459469992011-04-25T15:47:00.000+07:002011-04-25T15:47:55.949+07:00

i have always try to be there when they need me but when i need them? no one was there all of my effort was vain when the result's like this why would i be the fool? is it my fate to be one? maybe i've been trying to be strong for too long should i keep going? or should i stop trying? i don't know which to choose

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-80660211463102148642011-04-25T12:12:00.000+07:002011-04-25T12:12:39.856+07:00

wrong. it's all feel so wrong nothing is right no one is here when i seek refuge i just want to find peace i'm no longer seeking for glory since the days have passed it's all over now, my glorious days

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-3022261605742445612011-04-24T18:56:00.001+07:002011-04-24T18:56:06.339+07:00

Maybe I'm standing on the edge of my consciousness and conscience. It's been years since I felt like this, and now the feeling is back. Rejection. Distrust. Betrayal. I am back to my old self, when there was no love. When there was only loneliness and hatred. When i had nothing but myself. You have betrayed me, and i thank you for opening me horizon. I have woke up from the deep sleep, and now

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-7501961722666829942011-04-24T18:02:00.000+07:002011-04-24T18:02:31.197+07:00

sengaja kutulis pesan untukmu di udara tak seorang pun bisa membacanya, termasuk dirimu dan diriku biarlah semua ini terlupa, tertelan oleh gelapnya malam terhalang oleh sinaran bintang di malam temaram senja, kapankah kau akan datang menjemputku? pergi dari keresahan yang melanda kalbu ini cinta, benarkah kau ada? atau engkau hanyalah ilusi dari nafsu belaka? malam, telanlah semua kesunyian ini

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-61759205380748699712011-04-22T20:32:00.001+07:002011-04-22T20:32:18.642+07:00

I have finally found my place In the corner, where there's no light Befriends with darkness and solitude When others shared their happiness I am here, left in the corner, alone And i know it's not my place to ask Because i don't deserve anything All that is left is myself And the loneliness And the solitude No less, no more Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-35296584026095443692011-04-22T19:24:00.001+07:002011-04-22T19:24:11.538+07:00

And now i'm kinda lost between reality and imagination. Trapped between darkness and the light. I have no idea which to choose. Is it the path of solemn righteousness or the path of wrathful incidents? I'd prefer tranquility over my life. I don't care which one i choose, as long as it gives me what i desires. I don't care which side i choose, whether it's good or bad, i don't care. I'll just have

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-9633372128188980152011-04-21T23:51:00.001+07:002011-04-22T11:55:43.424+07:00

have you ever, pushed yourself to love? love anything a person, or a job? have you ever, pushed yourself to love? love anything that will not love you back have you ever, pushed yourself to love? love anything that you don't have to love have you ever, pushed yourself to love? love anything that you have ever hate have you ever, pushed yourself to love? love anything that will put an end to you

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-6619767929818208962011-04-21T22:39:00.001+07:002011-04-21T22:41:41.507+07:00

here i am, walking alone no one walk besides me all left is randomness orderly chaotic beautifully entropic i keep moving forward working alone eating alone running alone sleeping alone dreaming alone i got no one beside myself i was there, but i chose to withdraw i was the one who asked for loneliness and still, i regret it

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-80667326340016489162010-11-16T22:40:00.002+07:002010-11-16T22:40:16.120+07:00

turn into ashes my friends! let your spirit evaporate as it disperse into the air to the world to the universe! as a man dies, thousands will rise again carry on the will of their predecessors marching towards the future and none shall perished from their humanely existence!

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-30843972654208594202010-11-08T00:31:00.000+07:002010-11-08T00:31:24.813+07:00

8 November 2010 03.14 AM GMT +10 St. Lucia, Brisbane Tried to roll on the bed, but apparently I can't Tried to release my inner tension, but it is too risky to do it now Tried to get high, but it is impossible Tried to drink, but if I do that, I would be crazed for the final exam Tried to do something stupid, but I know, I can't risk my future over something silly I'll just pray, for my fellow

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-58600493169672312582010-10-24T20:33:00.002+07:002010-10-24T20:33:19.564+07:00

night or day winter or summer rain or dry sweet or bitter tasted the same, felt the same without you

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-25154016141938032762010-10-23T22:09:00.002+07:002010-10-23T22:09:39.164+07:00

the glorious days has passed, and now am weeping in vain seeking refuge and shelter, but none shall accept clinging on false hope, shall expect nothing have no right to dream, even for a false hope blame no one, worship no one because there is no one to blame leaving the time of victory behind acting like nothing happened deep inside, crying the tears of regret none shall know, because this is

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-79424585478964667472010-10-15T18:45:00.001+07:002010-10-15T18:47:01.927+07:00

I have to push myself harder and harder in order to obtained the desired results. HIYATTTTTT!!!!!

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-86740625433381385462010-10-05T12:03:00.000+07:002010-10-05T12:03:59.490+07:00

At last... The previous week was such an exhausting yet exhilarating week for me. My parents were coming, my birthday on last friday, and preparing for the biggest Indonesian event in Queensland: Pesta Rakyat on the 3rd of October. As I mentioned in the last post, I became the event section team leader in the Manpower Division. Thus, I was quite busy last week. I feel so bad I can't spend that

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-35286819728973184172010-09-18T16:25:00.000+07:002010-09-18T16:25:34.397+07:00

I just received such a surprising news. I just became a team leader! For God's sake! Gue baru 2 bulan disini, dan alhamdulillah dikasih kepercayaan buat jadi team leader. Walaupun kerjaan tim gue bakalan relatif gabut karena job desc yang agak blurry, tapi gue sangat berharap tim gue bakal ngasih yang terbaik buat Pesta Rakyat 2010. Kayanya ini semua berawal dari mulut besar gue tentang

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-61091267560535495852010-09-17T12:23:00.000+07:002010-09-17T12:23:18.254+07:00

My parents are coming next week. I have no other feelings than happy. Yippee!!

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-71108201910742475662010-09-15T23:18:00.000+07:002010-09-15T23:18:39.887+07:00

Dammit, shit, and fuck. Screw yesterday's weather. It's so fucking windy, i hate it. It makes me prone to trapped-wind, an Indonesian disease similar to cold and fever, just add up some wind trapped in your body. There are three ways to let it off; first is to burp, second is to fart, and third is to had someone 'kerok' you. Or maybe need some 'tolak angin', one of Indonesia's mighties herbal

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-48695706420211031672010-09-14T15:26:00.001+07:002010-09-14T15:26:46.867+07:00

as the leaves of the spring emerge, leaving the cold winter behind as the barren wintery road, none's passing by as the beauty of polluted sunset, splendid yet deadly as the emptiness of a sub-urban at the midnight, leave a hole in my soul bring yourself forth, charge every opponents with your lance none shall kept you still because the world is changing so am i

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-51788646160427328222010-09-13T18:46:00.001+07:002010-09-13T18:55:54.657+07:00

Secara personal, gue beradaptasi dengan sangat baik disini. Well, salah satu kemampuan yang bisa gue sombongkan adalah kemampuan adaptasi gue. Nggak pernah jetlag, nggak pernah heatstroke, nggak pernah yang aneh-aneh gitu deh. Secara akademis juga nggak pernah yang aneh-aneh di lingkungan baru. Sombong? Emang. Jumawa emang nama tengah gue selain Dyah Lidina. Kalo gue sombong tapi emang beneran

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-64224798110845024482010-09-13T18:14:00.001+07:002010-09-13T18:56:46.049+07:00

It's been 60 days, 22 hours, 38 minutes since i left Jakarta, my hometown. The town where i grew up, where i learn everything, where i have m life with. Being stubborn at the start, i believe i will not miss Jakarta. Right until now, i haven't miss Jakarta so much, but i'd rather miss my friends. Not the school, not the city, not even my family, not even my room, but my friends. Born as the only

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-64589339466133100462010-09-13T17:14:00.004+07:002010-09-13T18:57:06.847+07:00

It's been quite a time since i last updated my blog. Well, honestly i got nothing to say, but i will post several tweets of mine. Quite controversial, I personally think. It's about God, religions, and human. Here's some of it: freedom in this world is fake. freedom only bounds you onto it, not to salvate you from it. there is no real freedom, there is no absolute freedom. because nothing

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-13394592015026819602010-04-04T20:46:00.006+07:002010-04-04T23:30:15.317+07:00

Time flies. That's what my father always said to me. Indeed, time flies and I'm already in my 4th semester and 2 months away from my departure to Brisbane.I don't know. Ever since i've been in love for the first time, i haven't been able to write anything. Sadness, happiness, or love itself. Love has taken away my writings, I don't know why.Lately, i've been hanging out with different people.

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-53807939820255242852009-09-21T20:55:00.005+07:002009-09-21T21:28:13.749+07:00

just a moment ago, i read smita's blog. i'm not a good writer like her, i admit. but there are some things that inspired me (smichi, you're really inspiring! remember, inspiring not copy-cat :p), smita, whom i had small chit-chat with her behind the yellow bus during DaPur, about comfort zone and stuffs, about the future and that kinda awake me. i've been dreaming and sleeping all these times,

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-7803020000886361462009-09-15T23:14:00.004+07:002009-09-15T23:30:34.520+07:00

at least, i'm free from this chain of commitment that keep haunting me for this past months. okay, for just a mere second i can take a deep breath and relax, while my mind is thinking about having fun this whole week. well, to be honest i can't think straight because my brain has been drained for the sake of my future and academic life. all i can do right now is let the pressure gone for awhile

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-47228349125297250572009-08-15T11:08:00.000+07:002009-08-15T11:10:46.834+07:00

For the 2nd time this week, my plan has been ruined by you, mom.I got nothing left to do beside cursing.

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-7440899981795989562009-08-12T09:58:00.003+07:002009-08-12T10:16:29.981+07:00

i am not helpless nor a saviori am not a pilgrim nor a propheti am not a villain nor a heroi am not a slave nor a masteri am not a hypocrite nor a sainti am what i ami am menot you nor everybody else posted on 22.2.07

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-72455954828782309942009-08-11T18:05:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:08:31.029+07:00

i asked for ignorance, and it has been given to me. so, why should i mind?

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-60436078507079471032009-08-11T18:01:00.000+07:002009-08-11T18:38:11.571+07:00

what's the meaning of word freedom to you? for me, it's something sacred that should be internalized into yourself. not self in the narrow meaning, but rather in broader meaning, as if the freedom has melted into yourself, merged into you body and soul, it is something that should be solemnly worship by everyone who wants to be authentic, not fake.for me, somehow conformity just look fake. i'm

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-69573566495822567172009-06-09T19:47:00.000+07:002009-08-11T18:38:28.853+07:00

i wonder why...there are certain people that belongs to the certain community, that most likely to give words that give me somewhat false or fake hope. honestly, i don't care how hard the gales is slapping my very face with its' coldness or how heavy the rain is to fall from sky, with grace, as if the sky is crying so hard, brokenhearted.once and for all, i allowed myself to take another deep

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-15408294771058574112009-06-07T21:23:00.000+07:002009-08-11T18:38:49.537+07:00

What would you think if I sang out of tuneWould you stand up and walk out on meLend me your ears and I'll sing you a songand I'll try not to sing out of keyOh, I get by with a little help from my friendsMm, I get high with a little help from my friendsMm, Gonna try with a little help from my friendsWhat do I do when my love is awayDoes it worry you to be aloneHow do you feel by the end of the

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-8186169855166609812009-06-06T01:25:00.000+07:002009-08-11T18:39:42.659+07:00

I thought I could do it but I couldn't. I thought I can stop thinking about you but I can't. Images of you appear continuously beyond my consciousness, I have no power to control it. I got no inspiration to write, no spirit left in me. What can I do? Besides hopelessly wishing upon a star, once, and for all.

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-21975462034877859242009-06-06T00:02:00.001+07:002009-08-11T18:40:44.901+07:00

Tonight, I've cried several times and I still don't know how to fix it. Now, my tears has dried so there's nothing left to prove that I cried.

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-34590129278120968222009-06-04T23:45:00.000+07:002009-08-11T18:41:06.746+07:00

this is almost midnight, and i'm listening to my iTunes library using the headphone. well, maybe i was born to be an overcautious person, this is my very own fate that i should bear. this can be an advantage during time of war but not in time of peace like this. i don't know, i was just thinking the whole time, "was i born into the wrong family, wrong environment?". i feel like i've been cursed

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-80957500873086731002009-06-04T09:35:00.001+07:002009-08-11T18:41:26.971+07:00

it is so weird that i love looking through the window so much. i, myself do not really know why, maybe it was just a manifestation of my lonely feeling. embraced by loneliness, filled with emptiness, and the darkest darkness awaits me in front of my door. when i realized then opened my eyes, awaken from the deep sleep that God has blessed me with, too many things i've destroyed and poisoned,

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-67354584765788468832009-06-04T09:34:00.001+07:002009-08-11T18:48:32.030+07:00

i'm so sick of being alonebeing the one is not all goodsome feelings are missing from you heartgave you nausea all over againi'm sick to hell of itthese severe headache that has been blessed to mei never saw things clearlymy perception always never been clearalways blurry and paradoxingbut still, i never give a damn about thati'm filled with emptinessi'm blessed with this strengthbut in exchange,

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-89071996148642369632009-06-04T09:33:00.001+07:002009-08-11T18:48:43.282+07:00

i just wanna be quiet for the rest of the nighti don't care about what you think of menever care and never willthoughts on my minddoes not allowed me to think that simplealways complexthat's why sometimes they disgraced minethoughts that i treasured mostbeyond what you perceivedyou may think i'm not a lonerbut the crucial truth isi am a loneri am, the fact isnot the social typebut somehow i hate

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-35658447794456166722009-06-04T09:32:00.000+07:002009-08-11T18:48:53.301+07:00

how can i know you?when i'm only befriends with loneliness?i'm trying to befriends with everyonebut i don't know why?these feelings that only certain people haveand understandthis loneliness that keep embracing meas it always bebut then, i'm still trying to actualize myselfbut then, still, i don't know howi do realize that i am a cowardthe biggest loser on earthscared about anything that only a

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-26246130528913671562009-06-04T09:29:00.001+07:002009-08-11T18:49:07.193+07:00

it's almost midnighti still don't know what i'm thinkingand have no idea what am i gonna domy mind still stuck at a pointwhere endless random thoughts struck mequestioning every action i tookdoubting the existence that already existmy mind still floating in the spacei'm still pursuing the general truth that i've been seekingfor what?i don't knowtotally have no idea about that

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-75667818019581642232009-06-04T09:26:00.002+07:002009-08-11T18:52:25.993+07:00

when i tried to cryno tears came outi'm sickto live my life as a disappointmentuseless, lifelessproficient in translatinglanguage of loneliness and sorrowas i wrote thisinterpreting my own thoughts of miserywearing mask while doing my jobso they won't see me cryingstop giving me your sympathyonly make me sickjust don''t give me your pityit's only give me nauseous feelingthe unharmonious melodies

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-69951406393694683532009-06-04T09:26:00.001+07:002009-08-11T18:52:55.632+07:00

i just cannot breath easily like i used tothe pain that suffocating me every single time i triedto take a deep breath so i shall be freesome nasty thoughts that burdening my headdon't know how to ease thatgloom that had haunted my for these past yearsbut i don't know whyit's just disappeared for these past two weeksbut no, it's not vanishedit is my unconscious mind suddenly sealed itbut now, it

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-29204139685440373582009-06-04T09:23:00.001+07:002009-08-11T18:53:13.375+07:00

i just wonder whyeveryone seems to never give a damn about menever care about my feelingsi understand, they have their own things toounlike me, don't know what to doand in the end, i just made it harder for youi know, there's no one knows about how fragile i ameveryone thinks i'm strong enough to overcome my own problemsbut no, hell no, i'm not that strongthat's the mask i've wore and the ID i've

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-32502378996588088262009-06-04T09:19:00.005+07:002009-08-11T18:53:36.188+07:00

no, i am not that pure or innocentit was just your belief of me said soi often urge a fake smileto deceived and mesmerized people around meso that they think i am an angelbut no, i am no angel but in disguisethe devil that has the look of an angelto deceived the saintsthe pure, the innocentwill be deceitful if they're with mehow much impure i am, i still adore the purei really am don't know which

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-2046175827792481392009-06-04T09:19:00.003+07:002009-08-11T18:53:46.254+07:00

smiling at mefrom afarmocking me like usualteasing me with your perfectioni know it's funny to youbut to me, not at allif you want to despise me,do it right awaysent me right to hellbecause i'm uninvited by heavenleft in me is hatred and revengethere is no love in me

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-11778506568098983432009-06-04T09:19:00.001+07:002009-08-11T18:53:55.048+07:00

i just can't stopthinking or breathingbecause it's all i'm allowedand it is all i have left

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-57099184904634216422009-06-04T09:15:00.002+07:002009-08-11T18:54:37.458+07:00

my mind is emptynothing inside itsudden struck of lonelinessgrasping so fasttaking me awayunaware of danger, i amembracing me all over againwith total darknessawaiting from nowherenow, i'm trappedin this very nightno stars, no moonall covered by cloudsinsisting to keep my sight awayfrom the dusk i've been longingsince when i cannot rememberagain, overwhelming joygive me another headachewhich only

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-7676348047296781332009-06-04T09:15:00.001+07:002009-08-11T18:54:52.376+07:00

me, cynically point my sight over people that passing me by. wonder what's on their mind, their perception on me, do they notice me? what's they're thinking about me? do they have plan on me? but, yea, once again, it's only my thoughts over people. just like descartes said, cogito ergo sum, i think therefore i am. things are only exist in someone's mind, but if the world goes like that, everyone

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-17305506256484039922009-06-04T09:12:00.001+07:002009-08-11T18:55:04.652+07:00

well, actually i totally have no idea about what i'm gonna write. i'll just let it flow like a free river amidst the mountain i worship. for their being in natural air, give the soil fertility like you've never imagined it before, so you shall harvest at the time given.something occurred yesterday, something bad. shit happens dude. every single fucking time, it happens unstoppably because it's

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-59076053900088707512009-06-04T09:10:00.002+07:002009-08-11T18:56:00.646+07:00

again, sudden struck of loneliness has come to me. in the middle of a sunny day like this. why oh why? no it's not that sunny anymore, the clouds are covering the sun. i think it's gonna rain, but i don't know when. like myself, i don't know when i will meet the rain again. look out through the window, hoping i will see the green grass, but no, hell no. i only see that in my imagination, my

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-21205288893472779092009-06-04T09:10:00.001+07:002009-08-11T18:56:09.341+07:00

i'm breathless, after running for the rest of my life. i don't know what i'm pursuing. i don't know my goal. i haven't fully entrusted to give myself to the world. i haven't opened all the windows and doors of me. some of it i swore to never open it.wear a mask? i think i'll be doing that from now on. becoming an adult means wearing a mask overtime, isn't it? hahaha. so funny to see how things

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-90324532414134709542009-06-04T09:06:00.001+07:002009-08-11T18:56:19.884+07:00

i just try to be thankful, for every breath i take and every step i've madeeven this cold breeze, and such a lonely rainy day which i haven't see the sun for awhileraindrops fell every single time i look up to the skyas it fell onto the ground, my spirit is evaporated, goneas the cold breeze slapped my face with its' chilli won't be angry, and still be thankfuli was mesmerized by the power of

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-91038379471780258722009-06-04T08:58:00.000+07:002009-08-11T18:56:36.016+07:00

Wednesday, February 4, 2009 at 9:55pm the day went away, and i still doesn't care, of how do others feel and thinking. well, i didn't try my best for it. keep thinking about myself, or other way to say it, i was being selfish. not to be selfless like i said before, but i was being selfish. shit. i'm sorry if i've hurt you countless time before.time flies, with or without me realize it, i'm

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-74222528625436300312009-06-04T08:55:00.000+07:002009-08-11T18:56:46.159+07:00

'how hard i've tried, or how much i've done. there's no big deal, so don't fuss about that too much with me. because, i know, whatever i do, i'm gonna end up alone.'what i said above is just a glimpse of my random thought when i was hanging out with my friends. well, it's kinda paradoxing, or should i say, cynical? yea, i realized that my thoughts are so extreme in some ways. people said that i'm

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-34038468043670767692009-06-04T08:54:00.000+07:002009-08-11T18:56:57.648+07:00

when i'm feeling so lonely, i thought i could hang on you, but no, i just can't do that. seeing you like that, i just can't give you more burden onto your life. i try to be there for you, regardless situations i am in, but will you do the same for me?

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-19712809266699638972009-06-04T08:53:00.002+07:002009-08-11T18:57:09.141+07:00

running alone for the rest of the dayuntil i'm running out of breath and oxygenthat the poison has sucked it from my bodyi'm strengthless, no matter what you saysurpressing old memories i want to forgetwalking alone again, into the foresti don't care if the tiger gonna eat mei don't care of i'm gonna die because of poisonous bitewell, we're gonna end up alone if we die, right?alone in our grave.

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-37421739845767896382009-06-04T08:53:00.001+07:002009-08-11T18:57:15.882+07:00

The blue sky has turned grey, and eventually it turned darker and darker than I've imagined before. It shall give me no chance to take a deep breath and relax, even for a single moment. Time is chasing me, no matter where I am or what I do. However, I've been running ahead of Time, no matter how far or how close the Time is from me.I've been walking alone for quite some time, really am alone.

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-12919248306813605882009-06-04T08:52:00.000+07:002009-08-11T18:57:24.046+07:00

i just can't easily understandthe meaning behind every words you saidnor the reason why you said iti'm not that 'conscious' nor sensitiveyour implicitness is the opposite of my insensitivityis it my sin to have many people around me?is it my sin again to hang on not only to you?but, the quest to find the meaning behind your words is an adventuremany people around me, if it's without you, i feel

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-2900967981688157122009-06-04T08:49:00.001+07:002009-08-11T18:57:50.289+07:00

I let my feet walks, follow the path specially made for me. Making me count the steps I've made. Bring me back to reality, waking me up from my dream and deep sleep. Gave me life to live, misery to mourn, knowledge to learn, and goals to achieve. Rushing my adrenaline towards dangers and death of mine, leave me no worries behind. Death is the salvation from the life full of suffering, while life

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-15342947888738333002009-06-04T08:48:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:01:19.646+07:00

In the middle of the night, I cried in silence. Let no one know about that, I don't want to make you worry about me so I prisoned myself in solitude. Darkness is the light of my life while light is the shadow of my life. I need no sun rays to keep me alive because all I long is the night. The moon and the stars do not helping at all, they just do as they please, ignoring others. Again, I'm

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-45957785347504870092009-06-04T08:40:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:01:33.586+07:00

I face this freezing evening breeze, just to fulfill my promise of self-destruction. Looking up to the sky, but I see no stars above, only black sky on my sight. Truest darkness I've ever seen in my life. Try to take a deep breath and relax, but you know I can't. Memories of you racing in my thought, making me realize life's bitterness. No path is flat and firm, it is full of hills and rough.

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-48108938234131077822009-06-04T08:37:00.001+07:002009-08-11T19:01:45.977+07:00

I called your name in the dark, waiting for an impossible reply. Silently leave the room was my former intention, but the circumstances do not tell me so. Peacefully leaving this hollow world, you are looking for eternity. Serenity you can find anywhere but here, with me that blow your mind somewhere, across the styx river. Try to do the same, but my sanity kept me away from it. None shall give

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-75235813129121502692009-06-04T08:36:00.002+07:002009-08-11T19:01:53.118+07:00

I'm marching to the hell's gate for my past and upcoming sins. None shall stop me, because I'm acting on my own free will and conscience. Through the worst imaginary view upon my restless night. Racing in my mind my memories of you, when stars in the sky is the backdrop of our stage and the moon is the spotlight. The empty hill is the stage, while we are the only actors in the drama of our

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-41777322116762017722009-06-04T08:36:00.001+07:002009-08-11T19:02:00.452+07:00

I'm turning my back to the world, don't care about others' perception on me. Let them perceive as it is, be what they want to be. Let the world rotate as it is, follow the law of nature, law of the universe. I will overcome my roadblock in every way I could, including to get rid of this eyesore. Listening to the sound of guitar from afar, I keep loneliness as my companion, let others be.When I

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-7687353416753334262009-06-04T08:31:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:02:15.421+07:00

dearest you,whom has removed the NOD32 antivirus from my PC, i shall curse you with all my might and all my will. because of you, there are no protection to my fragile windows XP, and i have to do more work to fix this problem. because of you also, my PC is attacked by viruses, so that i have clean that up. you, who had removed NOD32 from the system without my FUCKING permission, is responsible

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-7946909524442480062009-01-17T14:14:00.001+07:002009-08-11T19:02:23.028+07:00

i'm hesitant. i'm insecure. i've always been wrong, never be right in front of your eyes. i don't have any courage to say this to you, so i'd rather write this than never say a word. i admit my faults, my mistakes. that's not your faults, it's all mine. a spoiled brat that unthankful to her parents. never done something adequate enough to earn a praise nor to please them.i know it is so childish

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-88189753979007670782008-11-17T21:19:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:02:33.622+07:00

hey, it's methe melancholy mei know you wouldn't have thought at the first timebut this is meit's so funny how the things work isn't it?what you've guessed is so different from the realityyour first perception is so blurryso unclear about thesewhat you see isn't always what you seewhat you hear isn't always what you hearto looked so lively like thisbut so indifferent insidepowerful but weakno,

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-43794198120184232062008-11-11T18:57:00.001+07:002009-08-11T19:04:28.389+07:00

you were rightalways rightit's like i'm the reason for all of thislike i will never be right, always wrongi'm living my own delusional realityi've cornered, beaten up till my last breatham i live for revenge?or am i just a coward try to runaway from this?for you, who made me like this, all that i owed you is my sweet and TASTY revenge.i am not a mere forgiver who can easily forgive you, like a

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-59330718946457232982008-11-11T18:54:00.004+07:002009-08-11T19:09:27.702+07:00

is it raining outside?to think that i do not want to knowthis heavy rain i don't want to meetbecause its' only gonna make me wetnot helping me at allto forget these feelings insideto forgive all of your mistakesin me lies a stone in my thoughts and heartskept crushing these happiness in memade them unto nothing i could hang on tomake me floating around, freely but with no final answer to all my

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-82623325085081783042008-11-11T18:54:00.003+07:002009-08-11T19:09:46.490+07:00

with these very eyesi saw fireflies floating aroundwhen i closed my eyes to make sure it wasn't a dreamit's all gone, because all i saw was just an illusionjust like these warmth you gave meeven it's only for a momentor only my imaginationstill be thankful towith these handsi tried to hold tighthold on till the endbut i lost my grip on.i am greyno black, neither do whiteno good, but no evili

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-76036885087197609002008-11-11T18:54:00.001+07:002009-08-11T19:04:49.337+07:00

these pain insidea lightning just struck my headdestroying everything i haveincluding hope and forgivenessso, here i amstruck by the lightningand stand stillfull of hatred and revenge

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-50578448888364666152008-11-11T18:37:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:05:06.951+07:00

how can i be free from this bond?keep holding me here in my path so i can not walk away from iti just want to break away and be the chain that keep me stillwhere keep me standing far away from you and still can do nothingwhat should i do to be released?just waiting in vain like any other?or should i try to find my way? different way?i just want to find my own way, is that a crime?after all, a

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-45266966590962390712008-11-07T19:45:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:06:40.820+07:00

this lonely feeling you gave mesuffocating everytime i take a breathburned by hatredthat came from overflowing joywhich cannot be repeatedand i tried to ignore iti've been longing for too longsince i cannot rememberi am unable to describe thesefeelings that slowly dissolve into my thoughtstoxicating my perception about the worldoverwhelmed with these excitementstopping my brain from

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-25564831882158789382008-10-30T21:03:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:06:29.229+07:00

i've never felt lonelybecause i'm the loneliness itselfthese sore you sent meshall never be forgiventhese breeze the wind sent meshall never be forgottenand i shall not loseto the fate i've chosebelong only to meo, myselfthen be the freedom itselfbecause the lonelinessgive me a waythe path of light and darknessthe i can choosewhich is feel right to mebe the goodor the evil

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-20731998033914244972008-10-28T23:16:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:10:02.295+07:00

i shall walk on my own pathhumming my own melodylooking towards the worldwith my own point of viewi don't care about how the world rotatemy own reason is to breath in and outis just to find the tranquility within mefrom outside i looked like a wounded tigerbut inside i'm a human like youwith my own thoughts upon myself and otherswith my own perception about the worldi shall see them with my own

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-66630189216672142292008-10-26T10:21:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:10:18.125+07:00

when i point my sight over youall i can see is griefsadness that protect you from disappointmentjust like a cocoon over youwhen i step into the riverand look forwardall i can see is chaosbecause i don't know what i'm facingi was blinded by hatredthe strength in me is vainwithin me is all emptinessall you see in me is fake

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-33369480760475948792008-10-25T23:33:00.001+07:002009-08-11T19:10:56.486+07:00

i stare through the windowjust to look at the starry skyand kept that in mindhow can i be like themfloating freely in the sky of the nightblinking naughtily to meand mocking me all the timein the time i longing for itfor freedom i never havenor my might will endure for iti shall spree my sight over tothe land i never seethe hill i never beenand so i will beginto begin everything that i startedand

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-35562298796989764622008-10-25T00:23:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:11:11.017+07:00

letting you go was the hardest partbut that is your fate that i can't interfere withyou must leave us in order to surviveor you can live up your mourn heresadness is your partnerwhere you are together,almost anytime i saw youeverything i saw is blueblurry and mistyblending with surroundingbut then, i realizedthis all just it isnothing to be changedjust stay right where you areand i shall stay to

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-68096754158440301752008-10-25T00:06:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:11:34.089+07:00

crushing my mind, that's what you do, did, and donelet me follow you into the end of the worldnot really the end but the world's endwhen everything is emptyand emptiness is the substance that fills in anythingparadoxing anywhere, anytime, and anyonetry to ignore these pain, but myself can't endure it longeri must stop nowstop loving youbecause it hurts me so bad so i can't do anythinghow can i

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-84013088467820818862008-05-28T08:55:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:11:46.799+07:00

fallen into the bottom embraced darkest darknesshopelessly waiting in vain for the prince who will come to rescue you just like every happy ending in your fairy tale surrounded by hatred shall not stopping me from lovingevery single moment is my own journeypursuit to uncovered every nature's riddlesi will keep on pursuing till God forbade me toi stuck up in my own journeyin a boundless

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-56024813877694045202008-05-28T08:53:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:12:00.401+07:00

i am still so deadso unrecognizableanother single breath i takejust to mesmerize all my thoughtsto grow a little sip of hope within meanother silent night comes and it still went awaybut the pain is unbearable just for a momenta single second is fly away so fastthe past still itselfstay the sameas the reign over myselfto rule but not to be ruledto give but not to be given awayto my furthest sight

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-50642605745431531202008-01-12T15:46:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:12:15.073+07:00

When a man is not a man as they were supposed to be. When days passing me through, felt just like a dream. As the brightest star came out, brought out the shiniest light ever known. When green grasses didn’t grow as they were destined to. When lightning struck right to my mind. When sun only gave out the light left. When white is not pure anymore. When a stream does not flowed as they were to.

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-72131104523066271212008-01-12T15:44:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:12:35.442+07:00

In the name of the rose I shall speak of loveIn the name of the rose also I shall hail the butterflyWhom recalled the moment of freedom and joyIn this very moment I would set back to be like itWhom never blossomed and floweredNothing but sorrow and griefTo the peak and to the ravineIs it the time of joy or misery?In the name of the sunflower I shall speak of joyfulnessTo hail the sunlight for it’

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-30066276052124507252008-01-11T19:46:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:12:48.270+07:00

in the name of the rosei shall hail the butterflyfor the fight of freedomfor things i've given up before the timewe shall keep our promises as it is shall keptuntil bitterness come and enjoy the feast for ussummer breeze has come to swept away winter coldnessbut in the endit will be dark again, cold againas if they were destined to be

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-84832281831719036042008-01-05T12:11:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:16:12.433+07:00

when i trust nobodyi trust thingswhen i trust nothingwhat should i trust?

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-66985159821130019302008-01-02T18:01:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:16:32.245+07:00

i did not choose to startbut why, these are keep crucifying me?again, i did not choose to startbut why again, i felt like just being stabbed by dull knivesthose thoughts did not washed away by tearsthose wounds that could not be healedinside me, there are always these kind of mutual reflectiona kind of loneliness that could not be seen by othershow happy i amhow am i in miseryso deep so light

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-197336623593377172007-11-16T21:44:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:16:41.748+07:00

as i lay herereimburse myself with tears I've got leftthis feelings start to crucifying mei have no strength to fought backeven just a little tryi have neither strong heart nor powerful mindi have nothingi am blessed with emptinessi am cursed with this thoughts upon youwhen clock stop to tickthere are no time leftto think or to feelto breath or to movebecause i am too late for everything.

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-42385623870901613362007-10-22T20:42:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:16:51.756+07:00

when hatred is all i haveand it is all i needwhen love failed to reach my heartas no light would come to medark is me, and light is not for mei am not a hero to bring you gloryso am i not a man of everythingjust a mortal with eternal sin

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-73403823346100106582007-10-01T14:22:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:17:14.187+07:00

i am greywithin me lies eternal greynessi am no white so shall no blacki am an angel of my fellows so a demon of my enemiesboth in the dark and lightat the mean time nor in the dark so neither in lightlive in border of everythingwhere am i not belong to anything

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-52482500952349215152007-08-26T23:30:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:17:26.494+07:00

selalu selalu dan selalu gue yang salahsalahin aja gue terus emang gue yg salah kan??1 dunia aja nyalahin gue terusdari bokap ampe sahabat gue aja nyalahin guei've got no place to rely on anymore, except me, myself.karma, karma hahahatuhan emang Maha Adilyah kalo gini terus sih gue udah gak punya semangat hidup lagiapa yang mau gue perjuangin?daripada jadi orang yg gak guna sih mendingan gue

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-42496395347510369282007-08-10T18:55:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:17:37.731+07:00

fallen into deepest oceanuntil you broken into piecesunrecognizable, unrepairablelost your sight, voices, even feelingsbut not stop you from strugglingto live and to lovewhen every man stop fighting,you are stillstay even not the sameas you were beforefight the fate, the way you were fated tothey said you were too brokenleft you unhealed on the cornerbut no you're not unhealedjust try all the

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-8150822050823158382007-07-30T20:16:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:17:47.068+07:00

i am blindblinded by emptiness within metaking my breath awayi am breathless for the battle, to live and to love

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-45276738970669917472007-07-30T20:15:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:17:54.617+07:00

time is killing me, without youit is such a hard time for me, usdoesn't belonged anymore, our heartblackened by emptiness

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-3585882974041471422007-07-30T20:13:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:18:08.887+07:00

hypocrisy has melted into ourselvesmerged us into strong yet weak sisterhoodmaking me understood is such a hard timethat each of us belongs to hypocrisyno matter how hard i have triedi am still belongs to you

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22546272.post-11562843383253666072007-07-19T19:22:00.000+07:002009-08-11T19:18:23.569+07:00

dingin, sepi bagaikan sendiri di tengah badaijauh di lembah kesunyian, asing dari hingar bingar kehidupantak ada sinar mentari yang menyinarisatu demi satu hilang tertelan kegelapan

adyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14976616047250889268noreply@blogger.com0